except that i think i had a bad dream. but i woke up. and im still alive. and everything is the same. and life is as it should be. so for that, it was an amazing nap.
God has been speaking, no, yelling (in his sweet but powerful voice) truth to my heart in the last few days. about who i am. who He has wonderfully made me to become. what His plans are for me. i always say "His thoughts are not my thoughts, His plans are not my plans". it really is true. and i am thankful every moment for that. my plans are always messy. my thoughts are sometimes troubled. but thank you Lord for having it all together, and having a plan bigger than me. something that doesnt usually make sense, or go along with what i think is ideal. because, lets be honest. i am a dodgy mess.
ha.
i picked up my worn out copy of the ragamuffin gospel today. it is my go to. when i want something quickly, that i know i will find. something underlined with exclamation marks that screams "hey you, look how small you are! and look how big He is! " something that would give me a little bit of grace and little bit of light. i found a few paragraphs to share. of God's character. the character that ive known and seen so evidently in my life these last few months.
page sixty three through sixty four.
"mark notes carefully that Jesus picked them [the children] up one by one, cradled them and gave them His blessing. my friend robert frost comments: 'i am so glad Jesus didnt suggest they group all the children together for a sort of general blessing because he was tired. instead he took time to hold each child close to his heart and to earnestly pray for them all...then they joyfully scampered off to bed. one of tenderly reminded of a beautiful messianic passage from the prophets. "He will feed his flock like a shepherd, he will gather the lambs in his arms, he will carry them in his bosom, and will gently lead those that have their young' (isaiah 40:11). i think there is a lesson here for anyone who would seek to set any kind of false condition just who should be recipients of Gods grace. He blessed them all."
notes: he blessed each one. each one of us he held. the children freely accepted and left joyfully.
and we are all recipients of His grace.
<3
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